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A Step in the Right Direction

Let me take a quick break from all the fluff and stuff to share a moment with you.

These last few weeks have been full of the highest of highs and extreme lows.

My step son has been in my life since he was three.  I love to say he was the son I got to pick, the other two I just was given.

There was always this line I was scared to cross. This stupid line “I’m not his mom and I can’t step on the toes of his real mom.”

His mom lived in California.  We’ve lived in Arkansas since he was in fifth grade.  I’ve been his mom.  Full time.  But always been afraid to give my full-time mom self to him. This sucks and is so hard to say, but I know my feelings aren’t something I share alone.

A couple of weeks ago, very unexpectedly, his mom passed away.  This shocking time has brought the realization to me of this line that’s now gone.  I’m his mom.  There are no more toes to step on….but why the heck did it take me this long to realize it???

If my children had a step parent I would beg that parent to love them with no restraints.  No child needs less love!  I know his mom would agree. We talked a few weeks ago for almost an hour about the highs and lows of being his mom and she thanked me for being there for him.

By no means am I saying I loved him less.  There were times when I’d hold back from extra hugs because I’d hate to seem to be replacing his mom.  I’d always expect my husband to do all the correcting when needed. Then, when he wouldn’t correct things soon enough I’d get extra frustrated and blow up. If I had felt the freedom to just say hey stop this or that there would have been no build up.

Stupid right?  It feels so petty now and years of wasted anxiety over something I should have known from the get go….I am his mom.

My step son just graduated high school, last weekend.  I celebrated with him with no fear of lines and no holding back.  He is mine, he has always been mine, and I am no longer looking back.  The past is what it was and the future is full of potential.

Be there for the kids in your life!  Either the ones you got to pick or the ones your were given.  Life is too short and everyone needs more love.

Now for some yarn….cause it’s what I do! 😉

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Gotta Get Moving!

A Belated Happy St. Patty’s Day from the boys. Mama Deb bought them Irish shirts for the day. Brady’s says “Irish Girls Love Me”, Austin says “Irish U were a Leprechaun” and Drew’s says “You’re so Lucky I’m not your kid”. They had a fun day in their shirts. Except Brady liked yelling about how he did NOT like Irish girls.

Jeanetta came over yesterday and was very inspiring and encouraging for me to get a move on! Toad Suck Daze is just around the corner and I have to have a very large inventory for the three day event. So here is what’s on the drying rack:

I painted two yarns and one roving. Jeanetta also painted one roving, and I let Brady paint a small one ounce bit. He is just so darn hard to say no to.

After Jeanetta left, I was still in a painting mood so I did a true variegated yarn. With spring in mind I dab and dotted my way through the whole skein in magenta, blue, green, and a darker magenta, which looked a bit purple. I also left a bit of white, it is always hard for me to do that. I absolutely adore it! I can not wait to reskein it to see the variations all mixed up.

I am also reading a new book. Craft Inc. by Meg Mateo Ilasco. I am hoping it will help me format my business a bit more and fine tune all the details I have been putting on the back burner.
And last, but surely not least…here is what is on the spinning wheel:
The painted roving was called “Deep Calls to Deep” and was actually listed on Etsy for a bit, before I couldn’t resist the urge to spin it myself. The handspun yarn will most likely have the same name, unless I am struck with a different inspiration.

That’s it for me now! I do not foresee having another productive day today. We just got our puppy dog, Daisy, back from the vet. She was spayed and is resting quite peacefully. Being the overprotective mama (of my pup) I have been watching her like a hawk. Until next time, happy crafting! ♥

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This is the story of the Sheep Hunt.

Last summer, having just started playing with my website, I wanted a picture of a sheep that I could use. So, I called up my sis, told her to come over…we were going on a sheep hunt. She said “Okay!” no questions asked. Gotta love the little sis! To get the kids into the spirit of the hunt, what better way then a sheep drawing on your hand? Once all the sheep were drawn…we needed a cheer…”Goooooooooooooo SHEEP!!!” That worked.
So, we piled in the car, with high expectations. We will find a field of sheep. Beautiful, well maintained sheep. And we will take the very best sheep pictures anyone had every seen.
Let the Sheep Hunt begin!!! We were off, randomly driving down back roads and highways in rural Arkansas. Come on, there has to be a sheep somewhere…Some of the fields were just to perfect to NOT have a sheep. Around and around we drove. How hard is it to find a darn sheep? Well, let me tell you…it’s not that easy. The kids never lost the spirit of the hunt, thankfully! AND there were some very exciting moments.

We came upon a very steep hill, at the top of the hill, I looked down, and there was a field full of “SHEEP!!! SHEEP!!!” I shrilled! I could barely contain my excitement. Everyone in the car cheered! Then we got a little bit closer and Megan said “Um…sister, those are goats.” Darn it! Don’t laugh, you try to tell the difference between goats and sheep from a long distance.

After the excitement of the goats had passed, we saw a deer. That was pretty cool…coming from Fresno, the boys had not had the chance to see too much wildlife.

The thrill of the Sheep Hunt and lack of seeing any was starting to wear on the three boys in the back. I looked at my sister, she and I both knew, our time was about to run out.

Just about then the phone rang and it was Granny (my mom), she suggested we put sheep in the GPS and see where that took us. Well, even though our darling Lee, the Australian accented GPS navigator, had gotten us out of many a pickle, this was one he was unable to help us with. Was this the end? Would our hunt actually end in nothing at all? I could NOT accept that. We put a drawing of a sheep on our hands for the sake of Pete! We HAD to find a darn sheep.

Up ahead was a gas station. I stopped the car and looked at Megan. “Go in and ask that guy if he knows where any sheep are.” I said as I pointed to the guy behind the counter. Megs looked at me and said “Okay!” and hopped out. Gosh, you gotta love the sis! She runs in and I watch as the guy behind the counter laughs and she laughs and then she runs back to the car.

“You are never going to believe this,” she says “There is a field full of sheep right behind the gas station.”

Sure enough, I pulled the Tahoe a little past the building and there in all it’s glory, was a field FULL of sheep. We had succeeded. We had found sheep.

We also found out why sheep need a good Shepard. These sheep were filthy. Dirty, dirty sheep. Poor little ones. Most of their wool was very matted and not very lovely at all. We snapped a few pictures anyway, I mean, really, we couldn’t go through all that and not have any photos.

The last picture turned out pretty cute, once I cropped close to it’s face.

Needless to say, we had a blast! We did find sheep and the kids were entertained for a couple hours. So, next time you have a few hours to kill, go on a Sheep Hunt. Be sure to draw sheep on your hands though, otherwise, you may never find a sheep.